Her Mistake

image

So I realised how a lot of ladies get extremely hurt when they did everything in the book and their men still cheated. It’s almost as if the hurt would have been more containable if they hadn’t gone through all of that ‘stress’
What’s the ‘stress?’ What they tell us to do to ‘keep’ our men
So I worked out every morning and evening; I ate healthy; I moved from size 12 to 10 in a month. I cooked a fresh meal for him everyday. I even got a juicer and made him fresh juice everyday; and I’m not even a housewife. I woke up latest by 4 everyday and left for work at 6.30 am. We don’t even have any kids so I’m expected to look really good right? Every once in a while I sent him sexy pictures of me while we were at work, I gave him a massage at least once every week and it wasn’t even scheduled. If he was my husband id tell you how he had full access to my body and how I was always ready to do new things, how creative I was in bed. I used the best body lotions and soaps, fixed my hair and changed my hairstyle almost every week, fixed my nails, I could go on and on…. And the *** cheated! He cheated!!!! They’d cry.
But i beg oo lemme ask you one question. When you were doing all of these things did you not feel good? Did you not feel like you were accomplishing something? Did it not make you feel proud of yourself? So why do you insist you did them for him?
I know. The premise was to ‘keep’ him but sweetheart if you hated doing these things then that could very well be a reason why he should leave your life. These things are to develop you; make you better- you; not him! Come on.

You want to know what you did wrong? Where you went wrong? I was in doing it all ‘for’ him. It’s not a question of his derserving of these; it’s a question of the joy in your heart in doing these.
Ok look at it this way
Does a cheat stop cheating or bullying you when you offer them things they’d rather take from you? A cheat is a cheat and if you find one for a man U choose to live with that’s your choice. You have no business hating him for the things you did to make U better.
There are some good guys out there. If you’re tired (Nigerian accent) my sister carry your bags and leave his life)! You deserve better.
That’s not to say the good guys will never cheat though. Lol. That’s never a sure banker. It’s a hope we keep alive for all of our sakes. He may, just like he may lie or forget an important date. It’s an honest mistake for such a guy and he feels sorry for it for a very long time. You first decide if you love him enough to stay, then you forgive him and you try and forget.
So girl, go on. Work that body, style that hair, wear that makeup. Just feel good and look good for you,- only you.
Cheers

Flirting and Feeling Sexual

image.jpegimage

I read about Cubans a few years ago. The culture shock! See I come from Africa. Here we’re taught the virtues of womanhood which in my tribe is known as being an ‘akataasia’ (cover yourself and hide). That’s the premise of being a lady. A beautiful well mannered ‘akataasia’. I’ve grown to love that word; oo the joy in our hearts when we’re called by that with praise.
But I’d never questioned the use of this word until after reading on the Cuban culture of seduction. After learning about their ‘Rumba’ dance and how they virtually live the dance. How their women find no need for altering their bodies in any way. In Cuba, young girls are taught to dance, sway their hips, move their bodies to attract the opposite sex. They are taught to flirt; and praised for doing it right.
So back to ‘akataasia’. The word comes in two parts- cover yourself and hide.
Why not cover yourself and step out?
I just smiled at the paradox there.
But seriously though, a lady worth her salt, one who knows she is sexy (as discussed earlier in feeling sexy) has no need exposing parts of her body for any man’s attention. Naah! That just dismisses the whole idea of self confidence. So by all means my love, cover your nudity; cover yourself. (‘Kata wo ho’) but do not hide (‘man sie’).
For us Christians, Paul mentions the need to respect the values of people in order to get them closer to the God we serve. The African value is to cover areas of the female body most especially the breasts and thighs. So while you are in their midst, please comply.
Now about the second part of the meaning of ‘akataasia’, step out, feel sexy, feel confident, smile, pay compliments to men and women who deserve it (do this tactfully though) and flirt.
Flirting boosts your confidence and helps you get in touch with your sexuality.
Flirting boosts your moral status too. I know, I said it.
Think about it. How do you get your head up high and your chest out in confidence, how do you keep flirting, when every man around you has seen your nakedness. The point of flirting is to make them thrilled by your presence, make them try to understand the mystery around you, and make you achieve because like we said, flirting builds confidence, your confidence breeds positivity and positivity breeds achievement.
So go on girl, get on with the flirting.

Feeling Sexy

This piece is for straight adult ladies ONLY

imageTo all the ladies I love
Pretty is what your mama gave u- u either have it or not.
Beauty comes from ur soul- some ppl may see it others may not. Your life so far and your surroundings will either enhance it or dim it- ino be your fault
But SEXY my dear
That one na u define am oo
And whether u like it or not, it’s from there u begin to attract men to u
It’s the beginning of flirting and flirting is a major act of confidence.
Every woman must flirt but let’s not deviate- we’ll talk about that one another time.
Now lets explore sexy because again, na u.
How do u sway your hips and allow your legs to move and your hands gently sway along by your sides when you walk?
How do you let your lips move when you talk.
How do you communicate with your eyes? How and when do you blink and how and when do you smile?
These are important ooo because na these things men and women go see make them talk say you be sexy girl.
But you have to feel sexy first and then all of these will come naturally to you
Here are the 3 steps to feeling sexy
1. Fortunately this step takes care of 70% or more of the process of feeling sexy. Get naked, I mean full nude and look closely into a good full length mirror. Take note of all the parts you hate about your body. Flabby arms, flabby fat and sagging belly that practically falls onto the floor, that nasty pouch, sagging boobs, flat chest, hairy chest, beard, moustache, thighs that rub together with no chance of getting a thigh gap, cellulites all over your body and worse on your thighs, k-legs, back folds, stomach folds, fat flat ass, overly thin body, overly straight body with no curves at all, I mean the list could go on and on but good news is you notice these things and you’re 70% or more gone in feeling sexy.
2. Think of the ‘few’ men in the world that could actually like these things. I say few because they must be really few for us to hate these things that much, but they exist. And they love them more in bed. Some play with the flabby skin, some tickle you through the hair, point is it can make really good foreplay. Imagine this as you think about those men n allow yourself to find that hateful part of your body suddenly attractive. Model naked, turn around, whatever- just begin to see how these men will love these parts.
3. Enhance some parts if you can. A good bra (worn the right way) will make your boobs look fuller and firmer. Wear the bra the way you know how, then holding one side. Eg. the right, push all that side of your boob into the bra, so there’s no boob outside. Your nipple may be off at this point; just gently move the medial side to cover it. Do same for the opposite boob; and gently move the back down as low as it can go. A good bra should maintain this position you have given it. Consider that when next you buy a bra. Another accessory is panties. Wear tongs to tickle your clit every once in a while when you move to keep you feeling sexual the whole day. Wear clean panties. Combine with your bra if you can or match colours with your clothes for the day. This gets you feeling sexy even before you put your clothes on. Get and use butt enhancers/lifters if you can. Butt lifters push your fat sagging ass up making them look more toned in your clothes. Butt lifters make your flat behind look more full. Wear corsets/ waist trainers if you can. Waist trainers make you look more curvy and corsets make your tummy look smaller/a little flat. These accessories are usually not like your everyday panties and bras so only use them when you really need to feel sexy for a day or a moment. But by all means, ladies, please wear good clean bras and panties u don’t mind if someone accidentally sees. Try and avoid any extra underwear like vests, chemises, slacks, stretches, etc. Unless you absolutely need them, please. Also for the sake of avoiding ‘white’ (vaginal Candidiasis), which I must warn could come with excessive wearing of tong panties, change all your panties yearly if you can; otherwise definitely do so every two years. Also keep all used panties and wash them together when you have the time and dry them in the sun; taking them off the lines dry and while the sun is still up, latest by about 5pm in Ghana. Keep them neatly together in a dry panty bag.
4. This is not step 4 don’t worry. Now you’re ready to step out in style in whatever clothes you feel comfortable in, whatever look you like and watch yourself get more forward, more sexual and more confident than you’ve ever imagined you could be. Our next discussion will be on flirting and feeling sexual. Keep your criticisms about these words till then😊. And I hope you pull off this new you in style as you take these 3steps. Till then…

Lexa talks but Adwoa is quiet.

 

Lmho. This phrase just defines who I am. Formally, ladies, meet Adwoa Ansomaa, Dr. Akuamoah, Mrs Akoto Gyamera. My names are many. I attended some school or schools I don’t remember before Almat Montessori Nursery School.
I usually introduce myself first by my education because in truth, that’s pretty much all I find a basic necessity for now.
Well I continued to St. Theresa’s school for 10years, then to Wesley Girls’ High School where I studied General Science. I stayed home for year while the Ghana Education Service arranged our West Africa Senior Certificate Exam results to place as in our respective tertiary institutions. While at home I taught Math in Primary 6 and Junior High School from first to third year in a budding school- it was the fist time their final years were going to write the Basic Education Certificate Exams. There were about 36 students and 3 had 2 in Maths, one had 1.
I went to the University of Cape Coast School of Medical Sciences and got out after 6 years with my bachelor of Medicine and Surgery degree.
Now I sound like a shark (a really smart student) lol, but I’m not.
Oo did I tell you I got out of St. Theresa’s with 10 out of 10 ones? (Virtually like straight As). You’re thinking I’m a shark again. Ok did I also tell you that most of my mates were as surprised as I was? Yhhh I’m not your typical straight As kinna girl, never bn my aim. I just like to be a good average. So I knew I would definitely make about 7 out of 10 ones.
I love Maths. I solved Aki Ola (a then students’ companion in Maths) as a hobby.
Then GeyHey. Gey Hey helped me find my real self in every sense of the word. I found my love for the stage n took part in Miss Agoro (a traditional Ghanaian beauty pageant) n came second to 14 contestants. I found my love for writing and completed a notebook with poems and one short story. I found my weakness of not being able to say no and addressed it. I found my joy in having really few friends and kept them. I came out of Gey Hey with 4 As out of 8.
In medical school I had already found myself so it was easy. I read everyday, went for every drink up in my hostel, went swimming at least once every month, went clubbing a few times, dated a few guys but went out with a good number; I lived! Those 6 years were the best in my life and till date, I have not a single regret.
In Ghana you work as a doctor under supervision for 2 years- it’s called housejob. I did my first year in 37 military hospital where my colleagues just loved to be paired with me for duties. We worked with happiness and made the hospital our home. I’m currently doing my second year in Police Hospital. Yhh tells you my love n need for orderliness and schedules.
I’m now married to my best friend since medical school, with whom I was in St. Theresa’s and who I had a huge crush on back then 😉.
Now meet Alexa or Lexa. I’m Alexa Annie Akuamoah on social media. I’m a lover of cameras and moments and things that mostly don’t matter. Once it’s online and it’s not face to face, I’m the most interesting person you’ll ever meet. I can talk! Your first impression of me would be too known, daddy’s girl, hostile, proud, unfriendly, difficult to approach and all of that; and you would not be wrong. Well not until I allow you to know me and you begin to doubt your sense of discernment lol. I choose my friends, I enjoy choosing them. More importantly I choose who should get to know me. I love to meet people and make acquaintances but it definitely ends there for me until I decide otherwise. Before you complete your process of hating my gut, consider the other side to it all. Im a dreamer in every sense of the word. That means I get disappointed pretty easily. Choosing my friends is my way of defending me against such disappointment and hurt. On social media, including whatsapp, we’re not friends; we’re acquaintances so there’s no chance of getting disappointed. There, you’re with Lexa, ever friendly, ever chatty, ever interesting. In the real world, you meet Adwoa and you find how Adwoa is Lexa when we become friends. 😊